Found Tweet Friday

Found Tweet Friday!

Friday April 27th, 2012:

Welcome to the Redlight District of Twitter

I spend a good part of my day using Twitter to find potential customers for my clients. I use the Twitter search function and locate people talking about relevant things that could translate to needs my clients’ products or services could fulfill. During this digging through the nonsense, the marketing messages, the slang and abbreviated hashtags, I find some pretty ridiculous tweets. Many that make my jaw drop. It never ceases to amaze me how many people forget that their tweets are completely public while they treat their Twitter conversations as if they were private. Some of those are simply too offensive or gross (not to mention misogynistic and lewd) for me to bother posting, but below are a collection of this week’s gems that I just had to share. My occasional commentary will be the parenthetical portions. Enjoy!

****Warning: Some content may be inappropriate for young or easily offended readers****

Found tweets:

– Some guy is casually scratching his face with his middle finger in my direction. I don’t even know I pissed this guy off. (Maybe he was doing that elementary school “I’m going to act like I hate you to flirt with you” kind of thing…)
– I was jerking infront of these kids and the girl i was with, and some kid wanted too battle me when i was just messing around (Ok, so where did YOUR mind go with this one?)
– Feminist group is sueing LEGO b/c they made a spa set with girl figures & they want the girl figures to be building a spaceshuttle… #women (But I’ll bet those #women can SPELL…so there’s that)
– i hate having to fight with nails on cus now my shit sore . . (Or maybe you just don’t fight. I’m just saying…)
– Girl you special like I met you in a slow class . (Ladies, if this works on any of you, we can’t be friends)
– Its crazy how I was walking home nd some dude was watching porn on a big ass flat screen lol . (Guy with the tv, if you’re reading…cuuuuuurtains.)
– U got a dig bick U that read wrong U read dat wrong 2 (Yeah. Read it again slowly. I admit. I fell for it too. Man…)
– This big ass salad is making me need to shit! Well what goes in must come out! #ThatsTheCircleOfLifeKids (Maybe not EVERY thought should be tweeted, yeah?)
– If I had the chance to drop kick you in the face.trust me you little crotch pheasant I would. (Well, THAT’S a new term…Can someone please render up a drawing of a “crotch pheasant”?)
– #YoGirlDontLoveYouIf she don’t massage your weener. (“The more you knooooooow”)
– Oh joy, the person in the next hotel room has decided to build a tower of squirrels. (Wait….WHAT? WHERE WAS YOUR INSTAGRAM PHOTO OF THAT??)

There you are folks! Some of the best and worst that Twitter has to offer. Obviously, some weeks will be less interesting than others, but I hope you enjoy it. Also, if you ever see any great ones worth pointing out, send them to me at robzaleski1@gmail.com. Maybe the one you find will make next week’s Found Tweet Friday!

Now go get your social on!

Author: robzie

I am a marketing professional who has a specific interest in social media and digital marketing. I love the outdoors, especially in the summer. Confessed coffee addict, social media nerd, and office supplies junkie. Feel free to contact me and start up a conversation!

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